I'm your not-so-typical-twenty-three-year-old who resides in Orange County and LA. (Shout out to my bestie, the 405 freeway.)
WARNING: You might not get a lot of fancy insta-worthy pics of me in a bikini on the white sand beaches of Bali, and you most likely won't get a pic of me holding a really hot Italians hand as we trail through the vineyards of Sicily and fall in love.
But here's something that most twenty-three-year-olds don't have: experience with all different walks of life.Yeah. I've literally seen it all.
Okay. Maybe I haven't seen everything. But in all seriousness, I have lived lots of different lifestyles. I've lived the "Runyon Canyon selfie with my kale juice because now I'm a vegan and everyone must know it" lifestyle. I've lived the "I'm going to rebel and pierce my belly button for $6 by a man named Rabbit in an alleyway in Hawthorne, California, because who doesn't love a good deal?" lifestyle (This is a true story that we won't ever talk about again.) I've lived the "I'm a really quiet girl who likes to sit in Barnes and Noble and be super modest while I study for Math finals that I know I am going to fail" lifestyle (it lasted maybe 2 minutes... I hate being quiet almost as much as I hate math). I've lived the hippie lifestyle (because who doesn't want to save the earth?) I've lived the "I only shop at Bloomingdales" lifestyle and left myself questioning how I was going to pay next months rent.
I've lived a lot of different lifestyles. All trying to find one thing: myself.
There's one lifestyle that I continue to live with a daily practice. Recovery.
I'm in recovery from anxiety, depression, OCD, panic disorder, anorexia, and bulimia. Say that five times fast. Basically, I'm a work in progress, like we all are. For years I have tried finding myself through all different people, lifestyles, trends. I've gone to treatment. I've read the self help books (The four agreements is definitely a winner). I've done the work on myself for years. I've got the tools. I know the solution to most of my problems today. So why is it so hard to implement them sometimes? Because I continue to choose fear instead of love. And I sit in the fear, until it builds and I can no longer feel the love that surrounds me. Marianne Williamson says, "Love is what we were born with. Fear is what we learn here." So maybe it's not about learning anything new, but unlearning all that does not serve us any longer.
Here's a few things I love:
My black and white Shih Tzu, Bella-Noelle. Singing. Acting. Public Speaking. Writing. Bloomingdales. THE MOON. Kate Spade. Hilary Duff (forever my idol). Rainy Days. Volupsa candles. My dog, Bella-Noelle. The 7 for $27 at Victorias Secret. Bloomingdales. Tazo green tea. Chai latte with almond milk. Frozen (Elsa is my spirit animal). The green tea boba from Urth Caffe. Dancing (I can't dance). Yoga. TRX. Barre. Pilates. Energy healers. Saunas. Drum Circles. Sage. Mint. My dog, Bella-Noelle. C&O Trattoria in Venice Beach. Laguna Beach Montage. Cafe Gratitude. Christmas lights. Mangos. Taking a shower after a long day at the beach. Oversized comfy sweaters. Eat Pray Love. La Croix. (am I basic enough for you yet?) Water with lots of lemon. Frank Sinatra. Coldplay. Grapefruit. Kale and dark chocolate (not together, of course). Whole Foods, Trader Joes, and Farmers Markets. My dog, Bella-Noelle. My mentors. Nice drivers. The ten second countdown on New Years Eve. Did I mention my dog?
I'm excited to see where this takes us. Thanks for walking with me on this journey.
Light & Love,